I’m not shy. I just act like it.
Not all of us can be the main character of the story. Most of us take on a supporting role and let the heroes do their thing. But what can a person do when he or she wants to make more of an impact?
Being reserved is sometimes by nature, sometimes by choice, and sometimes by circumstance. I never believe anyone when they say that they are just shy. No one is just anything.
Not every opportunity appeals to us. Personally, I don’t feel any desire to run for class president. It’s not that I doubt myself. I just don’t care. Let the go-getters go and get. Meanwhile, I’m busy working on my own plans.
I assume people have a specific image in their heads of what confidence looks like. They probably picture someone who accomplishes everything they work on, who is always the life of the party, and is always happy. Reality dictates otherwise.
Confidence has more than one look. I confidently cry in public when moved to do so. I confidently declare what my weaknesses are so I can improve upon them. The tough guy does not have exclusive rights to confidence. I am going to be confident in the way I like.
Recognizing confidence in others is all about location. You need to see someone in their element to know what they are made of. Can you expect to see how good a swimmer is without any water around? Can you measure the ability of a lumberjack in the desert? We all have the stage that suits us best.
A person can be shy on the dancefloor and confident in front of a microphone. A person can be brave among groups of people and nervous on a one-on-one date. All of us have confidence when we are where we are comfortable. And anyone can become unsure of themselves if you put them in an unfamiliar situation. How confident are any of us when we do something for the first time?
When you meet someone new you have to realize they don’t automatically know how to be themselves around you. Being your friend is something they learn how to do if you give them time. Friends and relationships don’t come prepackaged and ready for pickup. You are a complicated machine people won’t know how to work at first. Confidence is a learned behavior and comes with time. Teach people how to be confident around you.
I could go on, but I’m confident you can figure out the rest.