Dear pen pal.
Maintaining long-distance communication takes talent. Different rules apply to it compared with face-to-face interaction. Personally, I try to keep all my relationships face-to-face. What kind of a person prefers to keep their friends at a distance?
Circumstances eventually force us to not see the people we know. I go to work and leave my family behind. I leave my friends to go on a date with a woman I like. The more time I spend with one person, the less time I have with all others.
Some of our social life is left up to scheduling. My regularly scheduled social life consists of the people I see at church on Sundays, the people I see at work each weekday, and the people I see once a week for religion class. I was sick recently and missed church because of it. I had to wait another week before I could see the people I like.
Leaving our social lives up to the schedule is lazy. I want to see my friends more than once a week. I want to talk to people more often than my set schedule allows. I was at college for four years and I can count on my fingers the number of times people made a point of dropping by my place because they wanted to see me. It’s not fun being the only one who makes an effort.
People will say to me we should do something sometime. I have yet to experience whatever this something is. It makes me wonder where I rank when it comes to them scheduling visits with friends, work, going to the gym, and finally getting around to reading that book.
My friends don’t specifically tell me how often to contact them. What is too much or too little? Do people expect me to just naturally pick up on how often they want me around? Most people don’t know what their friends think of them until it’s stated out loud. I can’t just assume every person I know wants me to be featured prominently in their personal lives.
The longer we go without contacting the people in our lives, the more it changes the nature of our relationship with those people. Good friends who don’t talk to each other become fond memories. Family members that don’t talk to each other become distant relatives. A timer starts when you say “see you later” to your friends. Don’t make them wait long. You may lose your opportunity.